HORSEY FUN:
It is not enough for
a man to know how to ride; he must know how to
fall. ~Mexican Proverb
Many people have sighed
for the 'good old days' and regretted the
'passing of the horse,' but today, when only those who like horses
own
them, it is a far better time for horses. ~C.W. Anderson
It's always been and
always will be the same in the world: The horse
does the work and the coachman is tipped. ~Author Unknown
He knows when you're
happy
He knows when you're comfortable
He knows when you're confident
And he always knows when you have carrots.
~Author Unknown
Horses are uncomfortable
in the middle and dangerous at both ends.
~Attributed to both Christopher Stone and Ian Fleming
A horse is the projection
of peoples' dreams about themselves -
strong, powerful, beautiful - and it has the capability of giving
us
escape from our mundane existence. ~Pam Brown
The essential joy of
being with horses is that it brings us in contact
with the rare elements of grace, beauty, spirit, and fire. ~Sharon
Ralls Lemon
A Hibernian sage once
wrote that there are three things a man never
forgets: The girl of his early youth, a devoted teacher, and a
great
horse. ~C.J.J. Mullen
A canter is a cure
for every evil. ~Benjamin Disraeli
If the world was truly
a rational place, men would ride sidesaddle.
~Rita Mae Brown
A man on a horse is
spiritually as well as physically bigger than a
man on foot. ~John Steinbeck
When you're young and
you fall off a horse, you may break something.
When you're my age, you splatter. ~Roy Rogers
Look back at our struggle
for freedom,
Trace our present day's strength to it's source;
And you'll find that man's pathway to glory
Is strewn with the bones of the horse.
~Author Unknown
It takes a good deal
of physical courage to ride a horse. This,
however, I have. I get it at about forty cents a flask, and take
it
as required. ~Stephen Leacock
Four things greater
than all things are, -
Women and Horses and Power and War.
~Rudyard Kipling, "The Ballad of the King's Jest"
A horse which stops
dead just before a jump and thus propels its rider
into a graceful arc provides a splendid excuse for general merriment.
~Duke of Endinburgh
Wherever man has left
his footprint in the long ascent from barbarism
to civilization we will find the hoofprint of the horse beside
it.
~John Moore
Small children are
convinced that ponies deserve to see the inside of
the house. ~Maya Patel
A horse can lend its
rider the speed and strength he or she lacks, but
the rider who is wise remembers it is no more than a loan. ~Pam
Brown
One reason why birds
and horses are happy is because they are not
trying to impress other birds and horses. ~Dale Carnegie
I'd rather have a goddam
horse. A horse is at least human, for God's
sake. ~J.D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye
Spending that many
hours in the saddle gave a man plenty of time to
think. That's why so many cowboys fancied themselves Philosophers.
~Charles M. Russell
I go about looking
at horses and cattle. They eat grass, make love,
work when they have to, bear their young. I am sick with envy
of
them. ~Sherwood Anderson
Somewhere in time's
own space
There must be some sweet pastured place
Where creeks sing on and tall trees grow
Some paradise where horses go,
For by the love that guides my pen
I know great horses live again.
~Stanley Harrison
In my opinion, a horse
is the animal to have. Eleven-hundred pounds
of raw muscle, power, grace, and sweat between your legs - it's
something you just can't get from a pet hamster. ~Author Unknown
If your horse says
no, you either asked the wrong question, or asked
the question wrong. ~Pat Parelli
Gypsy gold does not
chink and glitter. It gleams in the sun and
neighs in the dark. ~Attributed to the Claddaugh Gypsies of Galway
A woman needs two animals
- the horse of her dreams and a jackass to
pay for it. ~Author Unknown
Horses - if God made
anything more beautiful, he kept it for himself.
~Author Unknown
The daughter who won't
lift a finger in the house is the same child
who cycles madly off in the pouring rain to spend all morning
mucking
out a stable. ~Samantha Armstrong
THE LIGHTER SIDE – Horse
Terminology
Hock – the financial condition of all horse owners.
Stall – what your trailer rig does at rush hour in an unfamiliar
city on the way to a big horse show.
A bit – what you have left in your pocket after you’ve
been to your favorite tack shop.
Fence – a decorative structure built to provide your horse
with something to chew on.
Horse auction – what you think of having after your horse
bucks you off.
Pinto – a green coat pattern found on freshly washed light-colored
horses left unattended for 2 minutes in a pasture.
Well-mannered – a horse that hasn’t stepped on, bitten
or kicked any human for a week.
Rasp – an abrasive metal tool used to remove excess skin
from one’s knuckles.
Longeing or lunging – popular training method in which a
horse exercises the human by spinning them in circles until dizzy.
Gallop – customary gait a horse chooses when returning back
to the barn.
Nicely started – the horse longes but there is not enough
health insurance in the world to even think about riding him.
Colic – gastrointestinal distress in people after eating
food at horse fairs and shows.
Colt – what your mare gives you when you want a filly.
Easy to load – only takes 3 hours, 4 men, a 50 lb. bag of
oats, and a tractor with a loader.
Easy to catch – in a 10 x 10 stall, that is.
Easy rider – rides good in a trailer…not to be confused
with “rideable.”
Endurance ride – end result when your horse spooks and runs
away with you.
Hives – what you get when you receive the vet bill for your
horse.
Hobbles – walking gait of a human after their foot has been
stepped on by a horse.
Feed – expensive substance used to manufacture manure.
Dog house – what you are in when you spend too much money
on grooming supplies and pretty halters.
Light cribber – we can’t afford to build any more fencing
or box stalls for this buzz saw on 4 legs.
3 gaited horse – a horse that trips, stumbles and falls.
THE HORSE HOLLERER
by Joyce McDonald
Horse Whisperers, of late, it seems
to me
Are getting too much notoriety.
Mr. Redford certainly paved the way
For them to smile at the bank each day.
I've come up with a new terminology!
Horse Hollerer works for me.
Tell me, if old Dobbin kicked at you
Just exactly what would you do?
Would you whisper, "You're a naughty bay-bee"?
Or would you holler, 'You dirty, rotten NAG"?
If dear, sweet Flicka decided to take a nip
And you didn't move at a fast enough clip,
Would you whisper, "Now you be good, but there's no
rush"?
Or would you holler words that'd make a sailor blush?
We get along great, my horses and I,
But sometimes they're bad and I don't know why.
There's a time to whisper, I think you'll agree,
But sometimes hollering works best for me!!
The Quilty Buckle!!
owned and earned by Chris Marks,
Martinsville, IN
click on photo for
larger image
FOR THE LOVE OF HORSES
>>>
Dance like nobody's watching,
Love like you've never been hurt,
Work like you don't need money, and
Ride like you can't fall off.
<<<
"You tell a gelding, you ask a mare, but you discuss it with
a stallion".
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